Love Heals - By Martin Brofman

When I decided to heal myself of terminal cancer in 1976, I heard the idea that "love heals." Everyone seemed to know this, and since healing myself was now a matter of life and death for me, I decided it would be a really good idea to add this to my self-healing arsenal.

I had been diagnosed with a spinal cord tumor at the level of the neck, and it had been declared inoperable and untreatable. I had been given one or two months to the year before, and by some miracle, I was still alive -- perhaps because something in my consciousness had changed in terms of my attitude toward life.

I still had to find a way to get rid of the cancer, and the idea of using love for that sounded like something I could use. The only problem was that I was not really sure what love is, and I felt like I needed to be sure in order to use it for my healing.

I looked around at what people were calling love, and much of it didn't make sense to me as a healing force. It looked more like domination ("I love you, therefore now I tell you what to do" ) or slavery ("If I ever found him with another woman I would do this or that to him..."). Certainly, there were a lot of different ways of expressing love, but these were not the emotion itself that I needed to use.

I went to hear a conference entitled, "What is love?". The person talked for two hours, and the conclusion of the talk was, "Love is." Perhaps that made sense to the person speaking, but I knew no more than I did before.

One evening I was alone at home in a meditative space, considering the question of love, and a symbol appeared on the wall, which I understood as a message from my Spirit. It was heart with light shining from the center, and the number "1" visible through the center and extending to the outside of the heart, with the word, "Acceptance," written below.

For me, this was the key to the opening of my heart chakra, understanding the true nature of love, and knowing when I was feeling that force that heals.

I used the symbol as a visual meditation, seeing different messages in it each time I looked, and understanding that this was because of the nature of my perceptual filter each time I looked at it, according to what I was feeling or going through that day.

One day it said to me, "Acceptance is Number 1." Another day the message was, "Open your heart. Look inside. See the light." Another time it was "Accept your individuality, and the individuality of others."

I could relate to Acceptance as something I could use to raise my vibration from a solar plexus place to a heart space. Accepting "what is" allowed me to emotionally accept the situation that existed, to remove the emotions about what was happening in order to be in a clear space from which I could change the situation. Accepting people as they are, rather than deciding how they should be, allowed me to let go of control, which I understood to represent tension in the solar plexus chakra, and see them from a clearer sense of freedom in the solar plexus, and in fact, to see things about them that I could appreciate, at the level of the heart chakra.

I found that if I thought of someone I judged, and the quality about them I thought was "wrong," I could ask myself if I could remember a situation in which someone else could have used those words to describe me -- and I always could. Of course, I could easily tell myself that when I was in that situation I had a good reason for doing what I was doing -- and then I could understand that perhaps, that other person might have the same good reasons -- and then I could see the other person with compassion, and perhaps not so different from myself.

I recognized when I was feeling the love, by the sensations in my heart, and I felt I had something to work with, something I could add to the other tools I was using to heal myself.

I decided that in a meditation I would surround myself with people who I know loved me, and to feel the love, the connection I felt with them. I could then take the feeling, the physical sensation that I recognized that went along with the emotion, and direct it to the part of the body that needed it, feeling that part opening to the love, accepting it, and feel something happening there, a little more each time I did it, until I felt no more symptoms. Eventually, when I went back to the doctors for a new examination, they decided they must have made a mistake.

There is a way to read the body as a map of the consciousness within, in order to determine the inner cause to a physical symptom. The key to this map is the chakras, the energy centers found in Hindu philosophy. Each chakra represents certain parts of the consciousness and certain parts of the body. When there is a symptom in a particular part of the body, we can see that it represents tension in the person's consciousness about something specific happening in their life at that time.

There is a personality profile associated with each symptom, a way of being that is not really who the person is, but rather what they have been doing. There is another personality profile associated with having no symptoms, a way of being that is always accessible in the person's consciousness, and that is who the person really is. Healing is about releasing the stressed way of being and returning to our natural state of balance. We can say that anyone with a symptom has not been themselves.

Why would someone choose to not be himself or herself? Either as an expression of love, to change in some way in order to be loved, or as a reaction to the perception that they are not loved, or would not be loved for who they really are.

When we don't feel the love, we look for evidence that it is there or not. "He did that, therefore he loves me," or, "...therefore he does not love me."

We are surrounded by people we love. An interesting question to ask ourselves is, "How much time do I spend during my day feeling the love that I have in my heart?"

Do we focus on the love, or on other issues that we have allowed to get in the way of the perceptions of love? If we have been filling our consciousness with the fears, anger, insecurity, and issues that are not really that important, we can choose instead to hold our attention on the love, and feeling the contact, reminding ourselves if we need to that this is really the most important thing in our lives, and what we need to do to remain healthy.

The more time we spend feeling the love that is always there, the more we strengthen our immune system, making it easier to release any symptoms and maintain our natural state of health and balance.

Love really DOES heal!

Article: Self-Improvement - 8 Keys to More Happiness in Your Life - By Sylvie Strong

Do you feel like you are in a rut? In our fast-paced society, it is easy to feel dissatisfied with what life offers. Consider these important tips for self-improvement and you will make more out of your time and your life.

1. Happiness Begins With Your Body
Focus on a healthy body first. Get plenty of sleep. 8 hours if you can spare it. If you cannot get 8 hours every night, go to town on a weekend night and go to bed without setting your alarm for the morning. Have a nice set of blackout blinds in your room so that the sun cannot wake you. Some people say that you cannot ever catch up with sleep and if you miss sleep during the week, sleeping longer in the weekend will not reset the clock. I think those people are stupid! Get 8 hours every night if you can, but having a weekend sleep-in once in a while can do wonders for your state of mind.

A healthy diet is critical too. Consult a nutritionist or educate yourself on healthy eating habits. Eat lots of fruits and vegetables.

Exercise. If you do not use your body, you will begin losing the use of your body as you get older. Nothing helps your mental and physical well being better than regular exercise. Hit the gym or your local yoga class a few times a week. Even taking a walk a few times a week can help.

2. Take Stock Of The Good Things In Your Life
You are luckier than you think. It is helpful to periodically take stock of all of the positive things in your life. Your family and friends may rank high on that list. Your health may as well. By focusing on the gifts you have received you will have perspective on the lemons that life throws at you.

3. Avoid Jumping To Negative Conclusions
It is human nature to walk around with a certain degree of anxiety or fear that others will think negatively of us. When we perceive negativity or distress in another person, it is easy to jump to the conclusion that they are unhappy with us or that we did something to cause them distress. Do not assume that. Find out if another person is truly unhappy with you or if there is something else that is bothering them. By doing so you will prevent misunderstandings and a rift in your relationship. Moreover, if you find out that something else is bothering them, maybe you can offer them comfort or help them with their problem. Simple empathy with the problems of another human being is good for others and good for you.

4. Everything is Gray
Our minds tend to want to think in black and white. But human motivations and behaviors are generally shaded in gray. Rather than attaching absolute qualities (good or bad) to people, recognize that human beings are very complicated. If someone does something that makes you happy, their behavior does not necessarily reflect on some absolute quality they cannot change. Instead, communicate with them to understand their motivations and see if you can work with them to develop a better relationship.

5. Avoid Negativity
Negativity can ruin your life. It affects your mood and your health. It poisons your relationship with other people. Recognize negativity in yourself and let it simply float away. If you find yourself drowning in negative thoughts, sometimes it helps to stop what you are doing and do something completely different. Go for a nice brisk walk through the park or go have some ice cream! A positive outlook can improve your life. A negative one never does.

6. Embrace the Healing Power of Touch
Human beings thrive on touch. Hugs will help your state of mind. Give and receive them often. You will help yourself and improve the lives of your friends and family. Get frequent massages, either from massage therapists or loved ones. It will improve your life. Better yet, get training and certification as a massage therapist. You will be the most popular person in your neighborhood!

7. You Are A Social Animal. Act Like It!
Human beings are social creatures. Invest in your social network and make spending time with friends and family a priority. Become involved in social activities that bring you in contact with new potential friends. There is nothing more detrimental to your mental health than being alone.

8. Help Yourself By Helping Others
It is hard to believe but the more you help other people the happier you will be. Try it! Lend emotional support to friends and family. Start there and then take it up a notch by volunteering for charitable organizations in your community. You will not believe how much purpose and happiness will come to your life if you spend time helping others.

Keep these 8 tips in mind and you will see more happiness in your own life and you will enrich the lives of the people around.

Masks Spiritual Story by Unknown

Don't be fooled by the face I wear, for I wear a thousand masks, And none of them are me. Don't be fooled, for goodness sake, don't be fooled.

I give you the impression that I'm secure, that confidence is my name and coolness is my game, And that I need no one. But don't believe me. Beneath dwells the real me in confusion, in aloneness, in fear. That's why I create a mask to hide behind, to shield me from the glance that knows.

But such a glance is precisely my salvation. That is, if it's followed by acceptance, if it's followed by love. It's the only thing that can liberate me from my own self-built prison walls. I'm afraid that deep down I'm nothing and that I'm just no good, And that you will reject me.

And so begins the parade of masks. I idly chatter to you. I tell you everything that's really nothing and nothing of what's everything, of what's crying within me. Please listen carefully and try to hear what I'm not saying. I'd really like to be genuine and spontaneous, and me. But you've got to help me. You've got to hold out your hand.

Each time you're kind and gentle, and encouraging, Each time you try to understand because you really care, my heart begins to grow wings, feeble wings, but wings. With your sensitivity and sympathy, and your power of understanding, you alone can release me from my shallow world of uncertainty.

It will not be easy for you. The nearer you approach me, the blinder I may strike back. But I'm told that Love is stronger than strong walls, And in this lies my only hope. Please try to beat down these walls with firm hands, but gentle hands, for a child is very sensitive.

Who am I, you wonder...

I am every man you meet. I am every woman that you meet.

And I am also you.

12 Ways to De-Stress Your Life Live a Happier Life by Reducing Stress - Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you have put on weight, have a smoking habit, or otherwise feel your life is out of control, weight, smoking and such are probably only the visible symptoms of a common underlying cause and the real enemy - Stress. Stress is a truly sinister and cunning opponent.

Here are 12 ways to de-stress your life, and in the process to jump-start your battle with weight, smoking, and other behaviors you wish to change...

1. Get more physically active. If your doctor okay's strenuous activity, get out and work up a sweat. Digging in your garden for a few hours is a real stress-buster. Go for a hike in the woods, pick a steep hill. Remember what you used to love doing, or always wanted to do, and begin today. Dust off your old bike. Buy an inexpensive kayak and learn to paddle. Choose outdoor activities whenever you can. When you are limited by weather or time, choose aerobic dancing to compelling music that captures your whole being. Or just workout until you are tired. But whatever you choose, focus on your activity. Don't talk, watch TV, or think about anything except what you are doing at the instant.

2. Spend time alone in nature. Who can stress while walking barefoot on a lonely expanse of sand, watching the seabirds soar and dive, and listening to the waves break and the wind rustle through the beach grass. Combine physical activity with time spent alone in nature by hiking, paddling, or biking.

3. Release your attachments. Stress is caused by the fear that we will lose what we value. We stress because we fear that we will lose our health, our job, our home, our spouse or friends. We stress that we will have less tomorrow than we had yesterday.By releasing your attachment to your possessions and your attachment to your relationships, you can eliminate most of the stress in your life. Make a daily practice of visualizing your life without those things you most value. Visualize yourself without a car, a computer, a cell phone, and recognize that those things do not define the true value of your life. If you are in a highly troubled relationship and fear that the other person may leave you, visualize your life without that person, and accept that your happiness in life comes from within, and not from any other person.

4. Simplify your life. Once you have released your attachments to your possessions, consider releasing those things physically as well. Search through your home for things you have not used in a year. Consider which of those items could be given away without loss to your happiness. Perhaps you want to ask yourself about the true value to your life of other possessions as well. What do you own that creates happiness and what creates stress? Would downsizing de-stress your life?

5. Reduce your obligations. Some people keep to themselves. Others thoroughly enjoy being president of their kid's school PTA and volunteering to drive seven girls to scout camp. But many others suffer with too many self-imposed obligations. If you don't enjoy a responsibility, and it isn't truly crucial, just say NO. Focus your volunteering on those activities that give you great joy and satisfaction.

6. Learn to love your job, or get a job you love. This idea for de-stressing your life is the most difficult one for many people. If your reaction is that you simply must continue with a job you hate for the sake of your family, think again. Your family loves and cherishes you for far more than the paycheck you bring home. If taking a different, more personally rewarding, job would make you a happier and more pleasant person, don't you think your family would appreciate the change? Turn the tables and ask yourself if you would want your spouse to work at a job they hated in order to bring home a few more dollars each week? Trust that they would make the same choice for you. Love and honor yourself enough to choose a career that brings satisfaction as well as a paycheck.

7. Begin a project you love. Give yourself a little time each day to work on something creative that you love doing and that makes you feel good about yourself. Knit a scarf. Play the piano. Take up woodcarving.
8. Know that you are not responsible for the whole world. If you are going to make a difference, take up a cause. Campaign for the candidate of your choice, volunteer in your local soup kitchen, write a big check to Doctors Without Borders. But then turn off the eleven o'clock news. Worrying and stressing about the state of the world, or the economy, or crime in your community, or the health of your Aunt Judy in Des Moines, or whether your adult child's marriage is going to fail, is a waste of your time and causes much unnecessary stress.

9. Give your time to others. It's hard to worry so much about yourself when you give your time to help those less fortunate. Consider becoming a community volunteer.

10. Forgive everyone, especially yourself, for everything that has ever been done or been left undone. Your anger and hatred hurt you. Forgiveness is the salve that removes the sting of past injuries. Resentments and regrets do not cure the past, but unconditional forgiveness does.

11. Have gratitude for everything that has ever happened or not happened. All of your life is part of a grand plan. You wouldn't be who you are today if you had missed out on any of your experiences.

12. View life as an adventure. Everything changes. The inherent nature of life is constant change. To fear change is to fear life itself. Once you accept that whatever you hate about your life will change soon, and that whatever you love about your life will also change, you can view all of life as the adventure that it is, and end your stress.

Once you are serene and happy, you are far less likely to feel driven to overeat, smoke, or bite your nails. Begin by de-stressing your life, and changing your behaviors will follow naturally.

Lizards Have Done It -Spiritual Story by Unknown

In Japan, a man breaks open the wall to renovate his house. Japanese houses normally have a hollow space between the wooden walls, and when when tearing down the walls, he found that there was a lizard stuck there because a nail from outside had been hammered into one of its feet. The man sees this, feels pity, and at the same time is curious because upon checking the nail he realized it had been there since the house was built ten years ago. What happened? The lizard had survived in that position for ten years! In a dark wall partition for 10 years without moving, the man found this to be impossible and mind boggling. Then he wondered how this lizard survived for ten years without moving a single step--since its foot was nailed! So the man stopped his work and observed the lizard, what it had been doing, and what and how it has been eating. Later, not knowing from where it came, appeared another lizard... with food in its mouth.

What It Means To Be Adopted

Teacher Debbie Moon's first-graders were discussing a picture of a family. One little boy in the picture had different color hair than the other family members.

One child suggested that he was adopted, and a little girl named Jocelynn Jay said, "I know all about adoptions because I'm adopted."

"What does it mean to be adopted?" asked another child.

"It means," said Jocelynn, "that you grew in your mother's heart instead of her tummy."

Practical Forgiveness- by Sheri Rosenthal

You can forgive that guy you dated a while back until you run into him someplace and then you want to wreak revenge on him. You can forgive your parents for your horrible childhood but as soon as you get on the phone with your Dad you are arguing just like you always have. So, what good is forgiveness anyway?

The key to forgiveness is to forgive from the heart not from the mind. Knowing in your rational mind that your parents did the best they could to raise you is not enough to constitute forgiveness. That is why every time you are with your Dad you still argue. If you really forgave him you would not be reacting that way. You would have compassion for his dream and understand that he is just expressing his point of view. If you truly let go of the pain of your childhood, your self-importance, and your need to be right about your point of view, you would not be taking him personally any more. If you were not taking him personally you would not be angry and it would not be necessary to punish him by behaving like an angry child. It behooves us to look at ourselves with honesty and objectivity. You can say you have forgiven someone in your life, but the proof is in the pudding.

If you have an emotional reaction in the presence of someone, your heart is telling you that you have not resolved your issues with them. In other words, you have not truly forgiven that person. All of this begs the question, how do we forgive? First, cease lying to yourself and stop telling yourself stories about why you behave the way you do. Stop blaming your behavior on other people and take responsibility for your emotional reactions. If you could forgive all the people in your life who have hurt or wounded you it would be possible to be in control of your behavior instead of being in reaction to other people all of the time. Imagine living life without experiencing a constant emotional roller-coaster of pain, anger, and jealousy! That would be bliss!

The important thing is to have awareness of what has transpired and be able to tell yourself the truth about it. Have you truly forgiven or has your rational mind been telling you a story that you have? Once you have determined what is truth and what is a justification, you are ready for the next step. Second, look at your life with clarity. Try to see what happened in your past, not only from your point of view, but also from the other person’s point of view. We need to be able to walk in the other persons shoes to understand why things happened the way they did. That doesn’t mean you have to agree with what they did or how they did it. Not at all. Your values and beliefs may be very different from theirs. All this means is that you can see the whole truth of what happened and the whole truth encompasses all points of view, not just your own.

Take some time to listen to how you tell the story of your life. Perhaps it would be helpful to journal the story of a particular time in your life that you have been challenged by. Listen to what you have written. Does it sound like you were victimized by your circumstances? Be objective, if someone heard your story would they say someone did you wrong, that you are resentful, vengeful and angry? If so, this is your first clue that you are seeing things from only one point of view. Why? Well, if you felt like someone hurt you then obviously you took the other persons actions personally. You assumed you knew why they did what they did according to your point of view and your beliefs about their words or actions. Chances are that your interpretation of what the other person did or said was not what the other person had in mind when they interacted with you. The key is to imagine what happened from their point of view.

Once you have seen the truth you must make the decision to let go of the pain, anger, and resentment you have been holding on to. This requires you to take action. If you are attached to your pain, resentment, and self-righteousness, and addicted to your emotional reactions, this will be a difficult step for you. Taking action requires letting go of the very thing you have been holding on to for so many years. There is comfort in what we find familiar, even if we are experiencing pain and suffering. The pain and suffering itself becomes the familiarity we seek. It takes absolute faith in yourself plus courage, will, and discipline to let go. But once you let go, it will be as if the weight of the world has been taken off your shoulders. In this process it is important to forgive not just the others in our lives, but also ourselves. For most people, giving ourselves the gift of forgiveness is very challenging.

• Forgive yourself for using people in your life to hurt yourself.
• Forgive yourself for not having clarity, for blaming others, and for not taking responsibility for your actions.
• Forgive yourself for wounding others and for the anger, jealousy, and hate you directed toward others.
• Forgive yourself for participating in situations that went against your integrity.
• Forgive yourself for not respecting yourself.
• Forgive yourself for not trusting yourself and having faith in your abilities.
• Forgive yourself for trying to control the people you love.
• And, of course, forgive yourself for not loving yourself 100% just the way you are!