The result? Millions of people are suffering undeserved stress,
trials, problems, and heartache. They never seem to be a success in
life. Bad days follow bad days. Terrible things seem to be constantly
happening. Theirs is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken
relationships. Worry consumes time, anger breaks friendships, and life
seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest.. Friends are lost.
Life is a bore and often seems cruel. Does this describe you? If so,
do not be discouraged. You can be different!. Understand and apply the
90/10 secret. It will change your life! What is this secret? 10% of
life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how
you react.
What does this mean? We really have no control over 10% of what
happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane
may be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver
may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%.
The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%! How? By your
reaction. You cannot control a red light, but you can control your
reaction.
Don't let people fool you, YOU can control how you react!
Let's use an example.
You're eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a
cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what
just happened. What happens next will be determined by how you react.
You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the coffee cup
over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your
spouse and criticize her for placing the cup to close to the edge of
the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and
change your shirt.
Back downstairs you find your daughter has been too busy crying to
finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your
spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive
your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an
hour in a 30 mph speed limit zone.
After a 15 minute delay and throwing $60 (traffic fine) away, you
arrive at school. Your daughter runs to the building without saying
good-bye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you
forgot your briefcase.
Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse
and worse. You look forward to going home. When you arrive home you
find a small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter.
Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning.
Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the Policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?
The answer is D. You had no control over what happened with the
coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad
day.
Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over
you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say "It's OK honey, you
just need to be more careful next time". Grabbing a towel you rush
upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase. You come back
down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on
the bus. She turns and waves. You and your spouse kiss before you both
go to work. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff.
Your boss comments on how good of day you are having.
Notice the difference? Two different scenarios. Both started the same.
Both ended different. Why? Because of how you REACTED. You really do
not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% is
determined by your reaction.
Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 secret.
If someone says something negative about you, do not be a sponge. Let
the attack roll off like water on glass. You do not have to let the
negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your
day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired,
getting stressed out, etc.
How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you loose your
temper? Pound the steering wheel? (A friend of mine had the steering
wheel fall off!) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do
you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at
work? Why let the blue car ruin your drive. Remember the 90-10
principle, and do not worry about it!
You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep or get irritated? It
will work out. Use your "worrying" energy and time into finding
another job. The plane is late. It is going to mangle your schedule
for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant?
She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, to
get to know the other passengers, etc. Why get stressed out? It will
just make things worse.
You now know the 90-10 secret. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results!!!
